You’ve Got What I Need…

But I say you’re just a friend. And I wish you would fucking spend.

I’m a bit of a tomboy. I’m a sports fan and have lots of guy friends. So of course, when I started dancing I was a little too loose lipped about informing said guy friends in hopes they would visit at the club.

Bottom line, my friends don’t make enough salary at our age and they are cheap (ie financially responsible, which doesn’t help me). Instead of jumping at the chance to see me rock out in sheer dresses and stripper heels, my guy friends keep clamoring for free private lap dances during my free time. Right, the first thing I want to do on my rare nights off is grind my ass against your crotch at your parent’s vacant house on Roosevelt Island.

“I’d rather spend money on you than the club’s cover charge” and “How much will it cost my friends and I if we come for a bachelor party” are a couple of questions I’ve fielded. I’ve ended up trapped in seemingly endless text message exchanges with guys who keep nagging with question after question after question as if I’m the club manager with all the answers. What ever happened to cutting loose and having fun?

Before I was blatantly using my body to earn money, I was able to maintain the illusion that these guys actually enjoy my company in a drink beers and watch baseball kind of way. Now that they know I’m doing something so degrading, they are milking it to play mind games. It’s like they’re dangling twenty dollar bills on a fishhook hoping to reel me in to their apartments in Murray Hill and the UES. I wish I were doing well enough as a stripper not to feel so desperate humoring them with all their godforsaken questions about dress code and lap dance prices. I’m officially giving up on trying to recruit my brokeass alleged amigos. I need to take this bad energy and turn it into a hardcore hustle tonight. I’m not so much frustrated at losing the money I thought I could earn off my guy friends, but annoyed that they are validating what I already knew; that they have been wanting to get in my pants for free or at the lowest bid.

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4 Responses to “You’ve Got What I Need…”

  1. Sara Says:

    Fuck those guys. You can get guys without them. : )

  2. Kate Says:

    Love your voice. It has an edge but its still soft and intelligent. I love that light you are shedding on the industry. People take so many things for granted in this world and rest on stereotypes to define their opinions. Thanks for the honesty look.

  3. Stephanie Says:

    Most guy friends are just waiting on the back burner to get in the panties. I too had a lot of male friends at one point in time, I would say within the last three years that number is almost nonexistant.

  4. Juliana Says:

    eeehh.. are they really friends, then, or just people to spend time with? ’cause if it’s the latter, maybe if you should find new ones… sometimes people suck.

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