American Express

Last night sucked, like every shift since New Year’s, and right toward the end, three well dressed businessmen came in, as it seemed, to save the night. First, one was determined to get lap dances on his credit card, which we normally can’t do. I asked the manager to make an exception, in my desperate state, but no go.

Then we did VIP room “tours” with all of the guys, and two were quick to say “Ok, whatever the others want, plus myself; put it all on my card.” Their cards were American Express corporate, and having worked for AMEX Platinum and Centurion, I noticed it was neither of those colors.

I can dig that they wanted points or wanted to expense their fun time, but my manager explained to them (this was news to me) “more and more strip clubs aren’t taking AMEX. They automatically charges back the amount to us and we lose the money; they don’t do any investigation on whether the charge was legitimate.” It wasn’t clear if she meant AMEX automatically sides with their card member upon a contested charge, or if they even go so far as to charge back strip club tabs without a card member complaint.

AMEX, like Discover, is the most widely declined card you often have to have a back-up for. Mainly, it’s because they charge vendors an arm and a leg; I also worked for a travel agency that didn’t take them, and that was for big ticket stuff. AMEX also, however, has the art of kissing customer ass and liability protection down pat. So I can see why their card members have loyalty. Let’s be real, here, my credit’s not good enough to get approved for one, so I shall hate away!

It was funny to see how quick the guys went from “three VIP rooms of any price on my card!” to “Oh, the lowest price is $420???? The lap dances are $30 and you can’t use a card? Jeez, guys!” They all looked good for the money and they all definitely have Visa or MC, at least as a logo on their debit card. But their gung-ho big shot attitude changed like night and day the moment they realized they couldn’t expense it AND likely get a refund on their fun time from AMEX. It was sheisty behavior on their end; the whole pushiness for us to take AMEX, followed by trying to negotiate private room prices: “If a lap dance is $30 per song and a half hour VIP is 7 1/2 songs, shouldn’t it be $30×7, like a little over $200?” (NO, because the rooms are fully private and the whole sales pitch is the illusion of getting more for your money in a secluded one on one setting).

That is one of my biggest pet peeves; businessmen trying to haggle and citing their own negotiating skills in their own careers as fucked up leverage.

To make the night worse, I bumped into the somewhat omnipresent coke dealer who works the club circuit along Bourbon and bought off him, despite how slow it’s been. He acted pretty fucked up about money, trying to charge extra for what I’d sampled before buying (isn’t it standard practice, “the first sample is always free?”) He hit on me and I turned him down, because I’ve started dating a guy I’m excited about and gonna give this whole monogamy thing a try.