They say cliches and stereotypes exist based on truth. While my peers on Twitter and at blogs like TitsandSass make vigilant efforts to debunk stereotypes and humanize sex workers, I was dissappointed to experience petty theivery at a private party gig.
I had worked for the company last year in Long Island and they generally book golf club parties that request eye candy companionship. I worked a party with a total of 40 girls and had the common sense to leave my phone and wallet in the car, but I wanted to bring some wardrobe changes inside and I hadn’t thought to change into stripper gear during the drive there, so I could leave my civvies in the car as well.
First of all, I was shy about mingling at the beginning of the party. I found out there was going to be an auction and all of us wore sashes with state names (I managed to score Miss Massachusetts to represent.) The one guy I clicked with during mingling time was one of only two to bid on me; all I went for was a lousy $60 plus and extra $10 he gave. Also, I had misheard the company owner when she told me what the base pay was; instead of the $450 I expected, my check was a measely $150.
So the bidders were representatives of four men groups for golfing format, which means they get the girl to themselves during the party. The one flattering moment I had was an older guy saying “oh no, I missed the chance to bid on you; we’ll have to arrange a “trade” during this outing when we see each other” (we never did.) The guy who bid on me immediately tried to solicit a blow job and didn’t even have cash on him! We caught up with his group and played just a few holes. Fortunately, his friend was generous; at one point, I pretty much demanded a proportionate tip and one of the black guys who loved my body gave me a $100.
When I returned to the locker room to change and leave, I couldn’t find the bag of possible wardrobe changes I’d stupidly brought in to supplement. I had a brand new set of lingerie from Italy, a couple flattering Victoria’s Secret bathing suits, and a very cute bathing suit from the same lingerie store in Italy, not to mention my very cute civilian dress and damaged but decent Nine West heels. Between the decreased pay, lower than expected tips and loss of goods, I really lost money on the gig in a way.
I had a better experience this past week. I decided “fuck it” and posted a Backpage banner ad for private stripping. The site has a bad rap but seems like a good resource for guys seeking private dances or private party girls. My ad only cost $4 and I managed to get one $150 dance so far. I said in the ad I wouldn’t see someone who didn’t provide information for me to vet them and feel safer, such as a LinkedIn profile, ID or Google-able information. I wasn’t about to see anonymous strangers, so I ended up not booking a few inquiries. Oh well, I certainly got the ROI on the ad.
In addition, I applied to two private party companies that were at the top of my Google search. The first one I spoke with gave me a run-down that honestly made me feel uncomfortable, but since I am hurting for cash lately, and I need money for a new apartment, as well as (hopefully) tuition money for Pre-PhD classes, I was tempted.
Fortunately, I heard from the other agency about a booking that same night before starting with the shady one. I worked a party of six cute guys for under two hours, making nearly $700. So much better than the pay per hour you average at a strip club, and of course, no house fee overhead and tip-outs helped too. The guys were cute and generous. One in particular was great at encouraging the others to keep the cash flowing, and not just $1’s.
A few things proved helpful. First of all, working the party alone meant twice the money of working with another girl. It also showed that up to six guys were tipping at once and I didn’t have to waste time on small talk and buttering guys up toward a sales pitch. I know they set the bar too high for me and other guys won’t be so loose with their money, but I’m looking forward to a fruitful future with the agency. Plus, compared with strrip clubs that often require 3-4 minimum weekly shifts, this is a mainly Friday/Saturday only gig where you’re not obligated to accept parties or work long evenings. The female owner is laid back and didn’t say I was expected to provide particular services or do gross things beyond my comfort zone. Another positive aspect is, out of the $200 the party has to pay, I only give the agency $100, which means I have a guaranteed $100 base pay, plus at least SOME tip money. Most agencies operate on tips alone.
Now, the other agency said a number of things that reeked of red flags; had they not said certain things, I may have gone ahead and worked with them. I’ve already had a negative experience with a Russian driver in New York threatening me and acting controlling like a pimp. You don’t have to be prostituting to have a pimp. Anyone who insists on controlling you and is willing to threaten you and cause you troubles in “real life” qualifies in my book.
First of all, the company requires exclusivity, and the male owner, who strikes me as working one millimeter on the right side of the law, said he’d not only fire a girl, but “make her life miserable” if he found out she was working indepently or with another agency. He also said something along the lines of “once you cross me….(I forget the end of the sentence.)
Another controlling red flag included the clear implication that our driver/chaperone would watch us like hawks to make sure we didn’t drink alcohol, exchange numbers to meet guys on our own another time, or even stay in the bathroom more than two seconds, as that indicates drug use. The guy told me the mandatory tool of the trade to bring was a “double ender” as if every single show, like a broken record, required fucking the other girl. Seems like I’d have a sore-ass pussy, and possibly loosened one. For the time being, I’m only comfortable working alone so there’s no lesbo shit, or doing lame girl-on-girl involving rubbing each other’s tits together, fake going down behind hair etc…
The guy said you have to be full nude the entire hour within about five minutes and I prefer a little more time before dropping my bottoms to break the ice and get a read on the guys.
The only promising aspect was that he was short on redheads and I might be a go-to to fill that niche upon request.
The agency I went with has slower business and is nationwide, not specialized to Boston and New England, meaning less volume of work and less money, but parameters I’m comfortable with.
The local agency owner claims to have very high volume, which may or may not be true (my accidental Russian pimp claimed I could make “at least” $500/night at a club that turned out a shitty Bridgeport, CT dive with cheap blue collar customers.) He is very demanding about time, saying Saturdays are mandatory, unless you truly can’t work them, in which case Friday would be mandatory. You have to show up at the main office, then you get dispatched with 1-2 other girls (or maybe on your own) with a driver. You are expected to be out all night until up to 6AM, when guys book last minute gigs (yeah, real appealing to deal with guys who are still up then, possibly thanks to drugs, and are probably drunk as shit.) The guy said “you’re on MY time when you get in and there’s no bailing out halfway through the night.”
I’m fine with his strict no-drugs, no-prostitution policies. This helps assure him any legal troubles won’t result from working with a given girl. But there was so much else that put me off, despite my need for money. I don’t need to be coerced into Stockholm syndrome and fear of “crossing” the guy. I am strong-willed and not as naive as I once was about the pimp-like, mentally abusive seizing of power and the upper hand. I refuse to work on the basis of fear; why would I when I strip largely to avoid the intimidation of office culture?
I missed out on a Saturday gig with the other agency because I don’t have a partner for two-girl party requests and live further from the location than another set of girls the agent has. I posted a thread at StripperWeb.com that I’d like to recruit a partner, so hopefully I meet someone who is sufficiently pretty and either willing to work within certain boundaries, or be the one to provide a slightly more raunchy show than me if she’s comfortable and used to it. A carpooler with wheels wouldn’t hurt, either.